humour Archives - Page 5 of 18 - Forever In Mom Genes

We’re Fancakes of This Pancakes Song

Mar 04 2014

Today is Shrove Tuesday—also known as Fat Tuesday. *looks down at muffin top in shock and awe* We’re not Catholic. As far as religion goes, we fall in the “heathen” category. When people tell me to go to hell, I grin smugly because I know there is no such place. Other than Costco on a Sunday at noon. Obviously. But whenever there’s a holiday or special occasion attached to a religion, we gladly latch on. Especially if there’s maple syrup involved. Or presents. So tonight we’ll be making pancakes. And singing this Making Pancakes song. Repeatedly. Like, the entire time we’re making pancakes because once you get it in your head it will be stuck there for eternity. #pancakepurgatory Additional Random Pancake Facts: We don’t actually eat bacon. I haven’t had pork on my fork since 1989. This song is my son’s morning alarm ring tone. I hear it EVERY. DAY. We love this pancake recipe: Fluffy Pancakes Fluffy Pancakes sounds like a stripper name. This is our fave “healthier” pancakes recipe: Breakfast of Champions Pancakes Pancakes were invented in 1794 by a serf in rural France named Jacques. They were so well received they caused quite a flap. Hence the[…]

Feb 24 2014

One of the best and somewhat unexpected benefits of being a parent is the comic relief. Parenting is hilarious. Kids have an exceptional sense of comedic timing that I think we lose as we get older. Maybe the funny moments come easier to them because they are free of inhibitions or they aren’t weighed down by the worries that are pinned to adulthood. It’s difficult to feel blue when your youngest child tugs at the hem of your coat and you turn around to see this… Yes little girl, you do amuse me. To my silly son who took this “somewhat” altered photo of me and called it Fat Pinocchio. I howled. Seems I’ve given birth to two Court Jesters.

Feb 21 2014

Warning: There is an X-rated-ish photo at the end of this post. I try not to whine too much online and most of the stories I share here on this blog have {hopefully} a silver lining kind of message. But man, sometimes a gal just has to vent. It probably doesn’t help that I’ve had a rough week culminating in an awful head cold and have slept with wads of Kleenex shoved up both nostrils for the past two nights. So if I may, I’m going to vent freely. Feel free to read or not. Here are ten things that got stuck in my craw today. If not dealt with promptly, this will result in a festering craw blister. Ouch. 1.The line up at the Tim Horton’s drive-thru this morning was at least twenty cars long backed up into the street. Get out of your car you bunch of laziess and go inside to get your damn coffee. The only one who should be idling, is Billy. 2. Traffic circles… please learn how to use them. The yield sign is not a suggestion. If I’m entering the circle first, I have the right of way. This means you not[…]

Jan 31 2014

The kids are still asleep and I’m up writing to clear the cobwebs from my brian. Oh my god. Brain. Not brian. I do not have cobwebs in my brian. I don’t even know Brian. Before we get this day started…. this bless-ed PD Day where both kids are home expecting to be nurtured and entertained and probably even fed, here are five random things off the top of my head. 1. Why do words appear backwards in a mirror? Sounds like a simple concept, but when asked, “Why mummy? Why the BEACH DAY letters wrong?” to a child who looks down at the words on her shirt and then back up to her reflection in the mirror confused and demanding an explanation, it’s not as easy to explain as you might think. Especially pre-coffee. I told my daughter to just put a sweater over her shirt. Problem solved. 2. I heard a radio ad calling for volunteers for an experimental seasonal allergy study. I had to laugh because I was actually accepted into a similar study a few years ago. I was seduced by the $4000.00 pay cheque for successful (i.e. the ones who don’t die?) participants. I[…]

Jan 29 2014

If a girl has PMS she’s going to crave a salty snack. If she craves a salty snack she will rifle through the cupboards in search of a snack like chips or crackers. If she rifles through the cupboards looking for a snack she’ll remember that she committed to a ridiculous agreement with her husband—something about no junkfood in the house. If she remembers there’s no junkfood she’ll have a hormonal hissy fit. If she has a hissy fit she’ll look to the sky and curse out of anger. If she looks to the sky she’ll notice a jar of popcorn kernels on the top shelf of the cupboard. If she notices the popcorn kernels she’ll smile and set up the air popper. If she sets up the air popper she’ll look for the large popcorn bowl. If she looks for the large popcorn bowl she won’t find it because it’s in her child’s bedroom filled to the brim with Rainbow Loom elastics. If the bowl is filled with Rainbow Loom elastics she will use a smaller bowl. If she uses a smaller bowl kernels will fly out all over the counter and onto the floor. If kernels fly[…]

Category - humour

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