September 30, 2014

It's Drafty In My Back End

If you're a blogger or love somebody who blogs, you'll know what I mean when I say my blog is busting with unfinished posts. I don't know what to do with them all. I guess I could actually finish and publish them. At some point...

But in the meantime they're just sitting there, taunting me, saying, "You have the attention span of a three year old. You're behind, you're WAAAAAAY behind! You'll never finish any of these. You suck. And you've put on a few pounds." Holy hell my blog is rude. Maybe I'll teach it a lesson and switch over to WordPress. Take THAT mean blog back end!

Someone once told me that as soon as they have a story idea they quickly jot down the working title in the back end so they don't forget it. And as soon as they have time, they go back and write the story.

Great idea in theory—the step they neglected to suggest was adding a few "guiding notes" in the body of the post. You know, for those of us "ginko biloba" challenged folks who post a title and then five minutes later have no idea what the hell the title means.

This is what my blog post section looks like on any given Sunday. Drafts, drafts and more drafts. It's like the NFL in April.

At one point I had over thirty unwritten tales in my back end. Er, that's what she said.

For the most part, I can usually remember the crumb of the idea. As for "My Daughter Is Not A Briefcase"... wtf was I thinking there?

I have absolutely NO idea where I was going with that.

My daughter is not a briefcase. Nor is she a backpack or a small suitcase.  I've racked my brain. I've even slept on it. On the idea, not my brain, because obviously I'm going to sleep on my brain because it's in my skull which is resting upon my pillow.

All of this reflection and nothing. I have no clue why my daughter is not a briefcase. I mean, I know why she's not a briefcase,  I mean to say, I don't understand why I thought this would ever be an engaging topic worth sharing.

So I'm coming back to this post now because I saved it to "draft" for a few days. A week actually. I got distracted with other things and forgot about it to be honest. But, during the week, I remembered what I meant about Avery not being a briefcase. The title actually fits perfectly, now that I know what I was thinking.

I'm not ready to finish that post because season four of The Walking Dead is on...priorities... but I'll write it soon-ish. And so I don't forget why my child isn't hand luggage, I've jotted down the jist.

And hey, is it just me,or is there a draft in here? ;)

September 26, 2014

A Brother Shows His True Colours For His Special Sister

You know when people comment on a video or a blog post saying, "This brought me to tears" or "This made me bawl"? Sometimes it's true. But more often it's merely a sentimental response to an emotional topic.

When I watched this video however, I literally sobbed. I cried out loud, which I have to say is both cleansing and bloody exhausting. And now through red swollen eyes I'm attempting to share this amazing tribute by a brother to his sister.

This sweet and crazy talented young boy of eleven, the same age as my son, wrote and performed this song (a cover of True Colours by Cindy Lauper) about his sister, eight years old, the same age as my special little girl. Sarah was born with Down Syndrome, but her big brother Matt doesn't see her as different—he sees her as special in all the best ways.

My son loves his sister more than anything. He made a video about her to help explain her differences to his peers at school. I guess this one of the reasons why this story touches me so deeply. 

If you watch anything online today, you must watch this video below. It's simply beautiful. The part where the friend comes to the door and the look on Sarah's face? I've lived that moment and I can tell you it's enough to make a mother's heart explode from her chest. Shit. I'm crying again. For real. And it's the ugly cry.

Watch this. And grab the Kleenex.


September 15, 2014

Say “Eye” If You’ve Had An Eye Exam Lately

Last night I stood in front of our full-length mirror and took a hard look at myself. “You know,” I said to my husband, “I see an old woman. My face is wrinkling, my body is succumbing to the effects of gravity, my hair is greying and I have age spots.”

Disgusted, I turned to my husband and said, “Tell me something positive to make me feel better.”

He thought for a minute and said, “Well, there’s nothing wrong with your eyesight.”

Okay, that didn’t actually happen. My husband values his life too much. No, that was just a little humour preceding the serious topic of eye health. I guess you could say it was “vitreous” humour. (I’m so glad I paid attention in high school biology so I could make that joke.)

But seriously, the topic of losing your sight is no laughing matter.

Did you read “The Fault In Our Stars?” It’s a beautifully written, but tragic story. When one of the characters loses his vision due to eye cancer, I could easily imagine how frightened he must have been. When I sneak into my sleeping child’s room at night to kiss her forehead, as I feel my way through the dark to avoid stepping on a sleeping dog or tripping on a toy, I imagine I’m blind. The feeling makes me uneasy, but soon I step out into the light of the hallway. With my vision restored, I go on with my life, rarely giving my eyesight another thought.

I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve had my eyes checked. Shocking considering how precious my eyesight is to me. Without it, how could I take care of my family? My daughter’s special needs require that I constantly look out for her—both figuratively and literally.

A few years ago I had an ocular migraine. I thought I was going blind. After that you could say I saw the light. I’ve scheduled yearly appointments with our doctor of optometry ever since—for the kids, and my husband too.

Early detection of eye disease significantly lowers your risk of vision loss. In fact, 80 per cent of vision loss can be prevented or treated. An eye exam can also uncover underlying—and life-threatening—health issues, such as Type 2 diabetes, brain tumours, cancer of the eye, eye tumours, high blood pressure, and certain vascular diseases like strokes and heart attacks. An eye exam can help save not only your sight, but also your life by red flagging other potentially serious health concerns.

Your family doctor probably won’t remind you to schedule an appointment with a doctor of optometry. This is something you need to do for yourself. It’s important, so do it and go annually. Appointments are quick and painless. In many provinces, annual eye exams for kids are covered, so it won’t even cost you. To find out if your child’s eye exam is covered in your province, click HERE. My husband and I have full coverage under our medical insurance plan.

Don’t turn a blind eye on your eye health. Sorry, but do you even know how many eye puns there are? I’m trying my best to put a ‘lid’ on it. ;)

So before I get on your last optic nerve, I’ll just end here with this list.

Simple Things You Can Do To Improve Your Eye Health:

  • Eat healthy — eat lots of fresh fruits and vegetables - especially leafy greens, and consider upping your intake of Omega-3.
  • Protect your eyes from the sun — consider this permission to buy those new Ray Bans you've had your eye on.
  • Wear eye protection — we wear squash glasses when we have Nerf gun wars at our house. As my mother always says, “It’s all fun and games until somebody loses an eye.” She’s right.
  • Consider vitamin supplements — Lutein and zeaxanthin (say that three times fast) and vitamin C to help you see.
  • Keep alcohol consumption to a minimum — sadly, highballs are bad for eyeballs.
  • Don’t smoke — unless you’re talking salmon *see point about Omega-3s.
  • Educate yourself — and then pass this information around to peeps whose peepers you’d like to protect

To VIEW more storEYEs of an OCULAR nature, LOOK no further. Read an ocular haiku/eye-ku here (Beware, the bloody eyeball photo is not for the faint of heart).

Or if like me, you spend entirely too much time staring at a computer screen, watch this to find out if reading on a screen is bad for your eyes and what simple things can you do to lessen the symptoms of eye strain:

This post was brought to you by Doctors of Optometry Canada, however the images and opinions are my own. For more information please visit

September 12, 2014

Bunions and Breakouts: This is 40


I'm forty-four not eighty-four so why do I feel like I should be joining a senior centre and doing needlepoint? Being diagnosed with a bunion has the power to age you faster than 48 consecutive hours in a tanning bed. 

I know there are worse things. Much worse things. But this one thing makes me cringe. And wince! A bunion can be painful—like wake you up from a sound sleep, achy, throbby kind of painful.

I'm currently tiptoeing into the primary stage. I can't wait to get to tertiary because that looks like some sexy fun doesn't it?

If you happen to be looking for some hot pictures, forget the porn and just Google "bunions." My god, my eyes. Disgusting bunions aside, people—cut your toenails! You might also want to hide your feet from cameras forever. Or just spare us the horror and put on some socks.

The word BUNION itself sounds awful. The medical term, hallux abducto valgus is no better. Valgus? Val-dis-gus-ting.

Bunions are a physical deformity. So, I'm deformed. Awesome. They are "characterized by a lateral deviation of the great toe, often erroneously described as an enlargement of bone or tissue around the joint at the head of the big toe." Thank you Wikepedia.

What causes this pedial affliction? Some claim the cause is tight-fitting shoes. Others say the problem is genetic. If you're an overpronater like me, you're basically screwed.

Is there a cure? Not really. So you'd better come to terms with your swollen bursal sac and boney metatarsal bump.  There is a surgical procedure available if your bunions become crazy painful or if you're a foot model or a lifeguard and your livelihood depends upon not grossing people out with your deformed feet. But before that happens, you can try to slow down the progression.

There all kinds of toe splints and separators you can buy, but they're ugly and uncomfortable. I just got fitted for custom orthotics designed to disperse the pressure on the ball of my foot. I'm hobbling to my podiatrist's office to pick them up next week. Yes, I now have a podiatrist. Hello old age home. I see you just off in the distance...

Ironically, I have an appointment with a dermatologist right after the foot doctor to see about this new adult acne situation. Why?? Why would an elderly bunion afflicted woman suddenly sprout pimples on her chin? It's just wrong. 

The 40s are cruel ladies. Cruel and ugly. Sonofabitch...


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