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Because She Was
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Rage Weeding
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Feeling My Age
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Advice From A Special Needs Mom In The Middle
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Digital Tools To Help ALL Students Achieve Success

Because She Was

When I first met Shelley Brouwer on Instagram I felt her warmth instantly. She was genuinely interested in my daughter and happily cheered on each of Avery’s little victories. At the time I had no idea what Shelley had been through. Then one day she messaged me to say she had written a book about life with her daughter. She asked if she could send me a copy of Because She Was. I was hesitant to read it at first—through Shelley’s beautiful Instagram posts and blog, I’d already discovered the ending. I brought the book with me on a road trip and read it from cover to cover in a few short hours. I couldn’t put it down. As my husband drove and the kids were busy with tech and snacks in the backseat, I read and cried intermittently along with the windshield wipers. At one point my husband said cautiously, “Lis, I don’t know if you should be reading this…” He was worried because of the tears. And yes, parts of the story are heartbreaking, but I was completely drawn in. Shelley’s beautifully written story weaves forward and back in time, outlining the history of her family’s remarkable life. And though[…]

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Rage Weeding

We all have opinions. We also have the right to share those opinions—respectfully and thoughtfully. But isn’t it interesting that some people who have no idea what they’re talking about… let’s say about special needs or epilepsy or PTSD (since they have zero experience in these areas), still feel obliged to offer their advice, judgement, and criticism anyway? And when I say it’s “interesting” I’m being nice. When we share online (and I won’t stop sharing stories about my life, our daughter, or my family because I believe it’s important and often helpful… the medical stuff and the struggles and triumphs I mean, not so much the cat pics and ridiculous puns) we open ourselves up to negativity. But, it doesn’t mean we have to respond to it, or believe it, or accept it. Unless you’re walking the walk (whatever unique walk it might be) maybe take a minute before you make assumptions according to your inexperienced experience. We all have the right to feel the way we feel. You declaring otherwise, isn’t going to change that. Sometimes our fears or parenting methods stem from experiences you can’t possibly understand unless you’ve been there. On a positive note—the anger I felt about this[…]

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Feeling My Age

I often hear other Generation Xers say things like, “I feel like a twenty year old in a forty-five year old body.” Or, “I feel like a kid inside.” I’ve said that. I’ve felt that. But not today. For whatever reason, I actually feel years older than my age.  Growing old is obviously a good thing, considering the alternative. I get that. But feeling old is an entirely different beast. A decrepit, dilapidated, creaking and croaking old bitch of a beast.  Maybe it’s seasonal allergies? It’s most definitely perimenopause… aka hormone-she-hell related. I’m also getting over a bug. Whatever the cause, I’m feeling tired, unfocused, unmotivated, and weak.  I’m a wilted shrivelled up flower. Which I’m probably allergic too ironically.  Here are a few things making me feel older than I am.  1. Reading glasses. I can’t read a thing without them now. I’m a slave to my specs, but I can never find the things when I need them. It’s been suggested I get a “granny chain” to suspend my readers from my neck.  2. Granny Chains, orthotics, iron pills, magnifying mirrors, sleep aids, root concealer spray, sensible shoes… I could keep going but just writing this list of devices and supplements has[…]

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Advice From A Special Needs Mom In The Middle

If you were to divide your special needs parenting life into stages, they might be arranged from the day your child is diagnosed with differences, to the period when they reach adulthood and possibly independence, or the equivalent based on their abilities. Some parenting timelines might end before that. I can’t bear to think about that. I know parents who had a child leave this earth too soon, and though it’s painful to imagine, I have learned so much from them. Their stories about grief, and strength, and compassion, and courage have encouraged me to find gratitude through the difficult days.  I’m a mom currently somewhere in the middle.   I read this quote recently. I don’t know who wrote it originally, but I thank them for these words.  One day you will tell your story of what you’re going through now, and it will become part of someone else’s survival guide.    Sharing our unique family’s story helps me to process, celebrate, and make peace with what whatever we’re going through. And if it happens to help or comfort or even guide others who are following behind us, that’s even better. Here a few things that we’ve learned along the way;[…]

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Digital Tools To Help ALL Students Achieve Success

Recently someone tagged me on Twitter, attacking me for my lies relating to the current state of our school system. I was shocked, but then I laughed uproariously when I realized this outraged woman had confused me, Lisa Thornbury, with the Ontario Minister of Education, Lisa Thompson. As I respectfully corrected her mistake, several tweeps suggested I take the other Lisa T’s place. Well thank you, but I don’t certainly have the stomach or the thick skin required for politics. However, if I did assume the role of Minister of Education there are a number of things I would do. And undo. The list is lengthy, but I’d start by making education an actual priority and begin on the front lines by offering teachers much needed support. Have you ever volunteered in a classroom? Ever go on to field trip or do homework with your child? If so, you know that teaching is not for the faint of heart. But, it’s our goal as a society to equip students with the skills needed to become functional adults. So it’s a no-brainer that we need to support teachers in every way possible so they can teach.  So what do we do?[…]

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