Tag - anxiety

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Social Isolation Drinking
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Anxiety and SAD
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When We Worry Too Much And What To Do About It
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PTSD—Always There Under The Surface
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Do I look worried?

Social Isolation Drinking

It’s no secret that I enjoy a peppery shiraz fireside or a frosty Corona with lime on the patio. The sound of a beer top being popped is one of my favourite summer sounds, second only to maybe cicadas or a distant lawn mower (not sure why I love that sound… probably a pleasant childhood core memory). Drinking is a big part of our social culture. “Wine-c’clock” has been glamourized and normalized. Blah, blah, old news. This post isn’t about that, or about binge drinking, or the health risks specific to woman and alcohol. Nobody wants to hear that right now. Epic buzz kill.  I’m not preaching the gospel of sober living. That would be rather hypocritical since chardonnay makes my day. That should really be on a t-shirt. Anyway, I just thought I’d bang out a few words about how this pandemic boozefest has become less of a supportive crutch and more of a hobbling. For ME, specifically.  As a rule, I rarely set out to get “drunk.” I don’t actually like the spacey feeling of being intoxicated. It’s probably a type A personality, first-born, controlling Capricorn kind of thing. I like to be in control at all times. That’s likely a[…]

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Anxiety and SAD

I don’t enjoy sharing my personal experience with anxiety because frankly, it’s embarrassing. I know, mental health should be stigma free by now. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, and yet I am.  I feel more comfortable discussing my anxiety when I preface my symptoms with the caveat that I’ve been through some trauma. I like to point out that the majority of my issues are rooted in post traumatic stress resulting from some terrifying medical emergencies with our daughter. It’s like by explaining that my situation was thrust upon me, by no fault of my own, I free myself from any appearance of weakness. I’m merely a victim of circumstance. My mind may go to the worst case scenario now and then, but I’m normal. Nothing wrong with this gal.  Apparently my ego requires a cushion since I clearly feel the need to justify my anxious feelings. Perhaps it would help if I carried my psyche around on a little satin pillow? I know I should talk about it though because I’m not alone. ESPECIALLY when it comes to parenting a child with a disability. By avoiding the topic of mental health challenges, I’m not helping myself or anybody else.  Here’s[…]

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When We Worry Too Much And What To Do About It

I understand the parameters of reality, so why do I worry so much? It’s pointless and I know that worrying is harmful, so why do I keep doing it? I think I have an answer. The first time I recall being really worried was when I was seven years old. My dad traveled a lot and one night his plane was late. I was convinced he had crashed and I worried myself sick. Of course he was fine. I had worried myself sick for nothing.   Over the years I continued to worry about a variety of things from A to Z — some realistic, some ridiculous.  They say only eight per cent of our worries are realistic. And of those, we can actually only do something about half. This means ninety-six per cent of the things we worry about are a useless waste of time. Why do some people worry more than others?   I have a theory that we worriers have three things in common:   1. WE NEED TO BE IN CONTROL We dictate and delegate, but then end up doing everything ourselves because everyone else does it wrong. We like to organize and compartmentalize and strategize and basically orchestrate the outcome[…]

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PTSD—Always There Under The Surface

Adrenaline is nature’s way of keeping us safe in the face of danger. It serves a purpose, but when a traumatic experience causes you to live in a constant state of fight or flight it can wreak havoc on your life. PTSD can wreck you if you let it.  We’ve all experienced that jolt of muscle quivering energy that floods our bodies during scary or stressful situations. Like when the car in front of us stops unexpectedly causing us to slam the brakes. Or when a glass slips from our hands, but we catch it before it smashes. Our hearts race, but we quickly recover and move on.  But sometimes the situation is painfully serious and the recovery time is substantial. Like when your child has a medical emergency—a near fatal seizure or maybe she chokes and stops breathing. I can’t begin to describe how frightening that is. We’ve been in this horrible place a few times over the past decade. We’ve watched helplessly as our youngest lay unconscious, or unable to take a breath.   Our daughter Avery’s near fatal seizures have rendered her lifeless in my arms. I’ve seen her lips turn blue. We’ve watched paramedics bring her back to[…]

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Do I look worried?

  Disregard the furrow of my brow and fidgeting hands. Apart from that, do I look worried to you?   If you say no, you’re lying. And I love you for it.   I’ve talked before about worry and how “Karl” is riding me like a banana crazed gorilla. We all worry, but some of us take it a little farther. Further? I never know which to use, but I’m not going to worry about it.   I don’t sweat the little things like that. I focus my worry on the things I have little control over. Like death, loss, monumental screw ups caused accidentally by me. Normal things like that. So what am I doing now to do to stop worrying so much? I’m TAKING ACTION!  You fellow control freaks know what I’m talking about. We like to be in the driver’s seat. It’s not that we’re bossy, it’s just that you do it wrong. What? I may not be able to control the outcome of every situation, but if I simply DO the things that are actually within my power and leave the rest to fate, I feel much more in control and liberated from worry. For example:[…]

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