* Lost Vegas

The internal turbulence I felt before jetting off to Vegas was appropriately matched by the turbulent plane ride. High winds and strings of thunderstorm activity resulted in a bumpy, nauseating flight. No matter – I arrived in Vegas unscathed and ready to roll. Though I didn’t end up rolling any actual dice, I did win a whopping $40 on the penny slots. (This is a pic of my “big pull”).

The Pit Boss had his eye on me after that. It’s what they do with us high roller types. (I’ve seen Rain Man and Oceans Eleven so I’m sort of an expert…)

So Vegas really is the city that never sleeps. It’s been over a week and I’m still exhausted. There’s so much to do there. Apparently in Sin City, your ass and boobies hanging out of your clothes is a major fashion do. Cursing loudly, carrying your heels in hand while walking barefoot along the strip, littered with shards of glass is another “hot look”. I’m too old for those looks or spandex yoo-hoo revealing minis and glass stilettos, but I held my own. Hippy Birks are hot right?

The weekend with my girls passed in a blink of an eye and we were all left wishing we had more time to catch up with each other. My only other regret is that due to a panic attack, I wasn’t able to fully enjoy our outlet mall shopping excursion. Somewhere between Kennith Cole and J Crew it dawned on me that I was unreachable. If my family needed to contact me, they couldn’t. I felt queasy and my head buzzed. I called home collect and hubby assured me that all was well. But it didn’t calm my racing heart. In retrospect, it was probably a good thing. I can’t imagine how much damage I could’ve done to our credit card if not for the distraction.

Despite my attack of the crazies, I managed to find a hot pair of shoes. I took those shoes out for a spin that night and felt sassy and much younger/hipper than my forty years. Man, that’s a powerful pair of shoes.We went to a trendy restaurant in the Venetian hotel called Tao where celeb sightings are common.

Sadly, Tao was celeb-less that night (well, excluding me that is…I HAVE been on local t.v. and everything so…LOL). After our meal and yummy cougar cake (thanks LW), we headed upstairs to the nightclub where we partied like it was 1989.

Bottle service is the way to go by the way if you have a large group.

You never have to fight your way to the bar and you always have a place to sit when you’re starting to feel a little peaked (see above).

Our comfy couched area happened to be right next to a group of 20-something lesbians. People have asked if I saw a show in Vegas. Why yes, yes I did. I think maybe they meant Cirque de Soleil or something…

We spent the next day recouping and relaxing by the pool – minus the poor soldiers we had to leave behind in the hotel. You put up a brave fight my friends and fought valiantly in the war of SickieTummyPukePuke.

Everyone left on Sunday morning. My flight wasn’t until midnight. So, it was just me, alone in Vegas. What is a girl to do? I’ll tell you what she does…she checks out, stores her luggage, takes a tour of the city, shops at tacky gift shops, chats up total strangers cuz she’s lonely and let’s face it, she’ll talk to anyone who’ll listen, lies by pool, reads a book purely for enjoyment and NOT for the purpose of genetic research, takes herself out for a nice dinner, gambles alone, tries to retrieve her stored luggage and realizes she’s lost the baggage receipt, panics, chats up the luggage guy and has him take her back into the storage area, locates her non-descript black suitcase in a sea of non-descript black suitcases, changes in the bathroom into her “airplane outfit” and hops onto the airport shuttle a sensible 3.5 hours before her flight because she’s anal like that. That’s what a girl alone in Vegas does or at least, that’s what I did.

All in all, isn’t wasn’t a wild vacay. It certainly wasn’t “The Hangover- Part Deux”. But it was awesome and just what I needed.

I love you girls. Thanks for this fabulous memory. I can’t wait to see where we end up for our 50th! I choked a bit when I just read that back. Fifty. Fifty?!!? I’m hanging onto my hot “Rock the Fringe” shoes for our big night out in 2020. I’m gonna need them. They’ll look hot with my support hose and orthotics though right?

*DS said as I was leaving, “Have fun in Lost Vegas!”

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  • That sounds very fun and exciting to me – Vegas is one of those places that everyone I know has been to except me. And those shoes!?? How fantastic and fun and spectacular are THEY? Love them! Glad you had a super weekend away – you really deserve it.

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