Goodbyes Are Never Easy
Miscarriage
This story is about a baby conceived, but never delivered. It’s about the thrill of finding out you’re pregnant, and then disappointment you feel when suddenly you’re not. It’s about miscarriage, but it’s also about chickens and abysmal record keeping. Random, but related. When my husband and I found out we were expecting our first child, we were overjoyed. I knew I was pregnant only days after conception. I just knew. A pregnancy test confirmed it and I went to the doctor for a blood test to be sure. We told our families right away because that kind of excitement just can’t be contained. We made plans, discussed names, researched strollers. I couldn’t wait to share the happy news with my class of grade two students, but I decided to wait the obligatory three months—which never came. At nine weeks I miscarried. We went through the usual panic—trying to fix it, trying to stop it, trying to save it. Of course you can’t stop nature’s course. Mother Nature is stubborn. She does what she wants, when she wants, for reasons only she knows. My husband called my work to say I would be off the next day. I needed a[…]
Read MoreMother of the Year
When Heather lost her three year old son Zack, she didn’t stop being a mom. Though her heart was broken, Zack’s brothers needed her more than ever. So she embraced them and loved them as mothers do while she made a plan to keep a promise; the one she made to Zack and to herself as they said goodbye. She vowed to keep his memory alive and to have Elmo, Zack’s comfort and joy, speak his name. And that’s just what she did. Heather tirelessly raised money to create a room (two rooms in fact!) in Zack’s name at York Central Hospital. She also persevered until Kevin Clash (the puppeteer who IS Elmo) knew how much Zackie loved him. Kevin knows and he was touched. And Elmo did speak Zack’s name. Heather is healing with her family and she continues to tell Zack’s story, not only to keep his memory alive, but to help other families deal with the pain of losing a child.” Heather and I became friends online. We bonded over our special needs kids and soon discovered we had many other things in common. When my daughter was in hospital shortly after Zack died, Heather kept tabs on[…]
Read MoreA Message For My Friend
There are so many joyful things in life—a laugh between friends that leaves you breathless is one of them. I can always count on my friend Sarah for one of those laughs. I am thankful she is part of my life. She’s a friend, but also part of our family. Last week her dad died, suddenly and tragically, and way too soon. It’s heart wrenching to watch somebody you love having to face something so painful. Our family stayed with Sarah and her parents last summer in Nova Scotia. Her father Gene, was a warm and funny man. I called him “Gampy Gene.” After laughing hysterically, Sarah corrected me. It was “Grampy.” I liked the sound of Gampy better, so I stuck with it. Gene didn’t seem to mind. When my son heard that Gene had passed away, he was quiet. Then he said, “Gene showed me the deers in his yard. He’s the one who told me what ticks are. You hafta watch out for ticks.” He asked, “Is Sarah sad? Did she cry?” It’s funny how kids gauge the gravity of a situation by how upset adults are and if tears are involved. “Yes. She did.” I[…]
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How To Choose A Baby Name - Forever In Mom Genes
[…] this later into the pregnancy when we were confident this one was “for real.” Those who have miscarried know…