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Dear Greta, We Are Listening
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When Your Child’s First Pet Dies
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Rage Weeding
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Feeling My Age
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How To Choose A Baby Name

Dear Greta, We Are Listening

Dear Greta, You have been criticized for speaking the truth that nobody wants to hear. You have been disregarded and disrespected. You have been ridiculed for being different. As a mother of a child with differences, and as a person sharing this world with you, I am outraged.  Instead of applauding your passion and wisdom, the adults you turned to for help, mocked you. The President of the United States callously belittled you on Twitter. Shame on him and people like him with their narrow-minded spite.  Please ignore the ignorant haters. Don’t give up. I hear you. My family hears you. We are listening to your every fact, warning, and call to action.  People point out your differences as though they are a flaw or cause for shame. You view “Asperger’s not as a disease, but as a gift.” Your gift helps you see the world in a unique way—not through rose-coloured glasses, but with crystal clear clarity.  Your neurotypical diversity and empathy have set you on this course as a crusader. Though your classmates were concerned when they watched films about pollution and starving polar bears, after class they were able to put those images aside. You couldn’t do that. You don’t work[…]

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When Your Child’s First Pet Dies

There are many life changing things about including a pet in your family. When you have a child with disabilities, pets can make a marked difference to their quality of life. Pets are more work in a “get off the couch and walk these ding dongs and change that litter and fill that food bowl…” sort of way, but I can’t imagine life without an animal by my side or under the covers. (Even though they should be in their crate. I know, I know…) The only true downside to pets, aside from mild annoyances like the occasional whining to go out for a pee at 5am, or fur on your favourite black yoga pants, is the ultimate downside which is of course the death of your best fur friend.  That’s the part that almost makes me never want to love an animal again. We become attached and they become family. Watching them go is hard. If you’re a pet person, you understand this completely.  Some losses are harder than others. When our guinea pig Ernie died from a seizure we were sad, but we’d had him less than a year and our connection wasn’t as deep as it was with other[…]

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Rage Weeding

We all have opinions. We also have the right to share those opinions—respectfully and thoughtfully. But isn’t it interesting that some people who have no idea what they’re talking about… let’s say about special needs or epilepsy or PTSD (since they have zero experience in these areas), still feel obliged to offer their advice, judgement, and criticism anyway? And when I say it’s “interesting” I’m being nice. When we share online (and I won’t stop sharing stories about my life, our daughter, or my family because I believe it’s important and often helpful… the medical stuff and the struggles and triumphs I mean, not so much the cat pics and ridiculous puns) we open ourselves up to negativity. But, it doesn’t mean we have to respond to it, or believe it, or accept it. Unless you’re walking the walk (whatever unique walk it might be) maybe take a minute before you make assumptions according to your inexperienced experience. We all have the right to feel the way we feel. You declaring otherwise, isn’t going to change that. Sometimes our fears or parenting methods stem from experiences you can’t possibly understand unless you’ve been there. On a positive note—the anger I felt about this[…]

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Feeling My Age

I often hear other Generation Xers say things like, “I feel like a twenty year old in a forty-five year old body.” Or, “I feel like a kid inside.” I’ve said that. I’ve felt that. But not today. For whatever reason, I actually feel years older than my age.  Growing old is obviously a good thing, considering the alternative. I get that. But feeling old is an entirely different beast. A decrepit, dilapidated, creaking and croaking old bitch of a beast.  Maybe it’s seasonal allergies? It’s most definitely perimenopause… aka hormone-she-hell related. I’m also getting over a bug. Whatever the cause, I’m feeling tired, unfocused, unmotivated, and weak.  I’m a wilted shrivelled up flower. Which I’m probably allergic too ironically.  Here are a few things making me feel older than I am.  1. Reading glasses. I can’t read a thing without them now. I’m a slave to my specs, but I can never find the things when I need them. It’s been suggested I get a “granny chain” to suspend my readers from my neck.  2. Granny Chains, orthotics, iron pills, magnifying mirrors, sleep aids, root concealer spray, sensible shoes… I could keep going but just writing this list of devices and supplements has[…]

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How To Choose A Baby Name

One of my daughter’s favourite Education Assistants at school is expecting a baby. This has resulted in great excitement at home and a lot of questions from my daughter. Like, “When are you having another baby, mum?” (Um, when pigs fly.) And, “When can I have a baby?” This one always breaks my heart a little. And, “Is Mrs. R’s baby going to be a boy or a girl?” (We now know the baby is a boy!!) And, “What will we name him?” Notice how she’s inserted herself into the process?  We won’t know the baby’s name until he’s born because they’re keeping it a surprise. Smart move.  When my husband and I were expecting our first baby we had a name reveal party—just for a few close family members including the grandparents and godparents. It was mostly an excuse for a festive get-together. Pregnant women will go to great lengths to have food made for them. We did this later into the pregnancy when we were confident this one was “for real.” Those who have miscarried know what I’m talking about. Somewhere around dessert we shared the boy and girl name options for our soon to be first born. We kept it[…]

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