Archive - July 2014

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Super Simple Summer Fun
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Taking Back The Word Retarded
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Grief-Helping Kids Cope
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Paper Bag Princess
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Affected By This? Then “Urine” For It!

Super Simple Summer Fun

  As Canadians we spend a lot of time indoors. This past winter was especially brutal. Spring arrived just in the nick of time because the Thornburys were getting dangerously close to a “The Shining” situation. Rum—good. Red rum—bad. My kids have been itching to get outdoors and back to nature and that’s exactly what we did last week. We spent seven glorious days with family at their cottage on a lake in New Brunswick— sans wifi or television. No iPhone grafted to my hand? I expected it to be difficult. It wasn’t. It was heaven. Here are a few of the activities we enjoyed: On day one of our vacation, thanks to the last remnants of Hurricane Arthur, we had no choice but to make our own indoor fun. To be clear, the dads coordinated the fun. I sat on the covered porch and read for three solid hours. Bliss. So what fun did the guys come up with? First they played a game — “Super Moose” (Reg. $29.99). It’s a wooden puzzle challenge where players take turns balancing antlers on a wobbly moose head. It’s meant for ages 3+. The older more dextrous and patient kids enjoyed it,[…]

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Taking Back The Word Retarded

  As the parent of a child with developmental challenges, delays, cognitive disabilities… however you want to label it, I often flip-flop between two perspectives. 1. Wanting to let my fists fly (which is pretty hysterical if you’ve ever seen me try to punch something) on anyone who uses the word retarded. 2. Simply allowing the word to bounce off me and ricochet back at them. People who use the word retard are outing themselves as people I’d rather not know. Their word choice says everything about them and nothing about my child or anyone with special needs. I seem to be juxtaposed between violence and a “so be it” attitude so instead of choosing a perspective, I’m creating a new one. I’m going to take back the R-Word. Others have done it—taken a word used to discriminate and have claimed it as their own. By doing so they’ve taken the wind out of many biggoty sails. My daughter is retarded… Okay wait, I need to ease my way into this because just typing that made me squirm. Those seven letters pack a punch. Retard means delayed or slow. By definition, my daughter is slow. She’s slow to anger. She’s[…]

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Grief-Helping Kids Cope

My husband’s mum was a vital part of our lives. There hasn’t been a day since she died that we don’t miss her terribly. As adults who’ve had years to develop coping skills, it’s still tough. So how can a child possibly deal with grief when they can’t begin to reconcile the devastation of loss and moreover, the finality of death? Our eleven year old son experienced anxiety resulting from the loss of his grandmother, so we sought help. Grief counseling has helped him begin to accept the death and has given him skills to cope with the fear of losing his parents and sister.   Avery, our seven year old, seems to be the most profoundly affected. She and her ‘Grandie’ had a special bond (one that my husband and I are convinced has continued in some other worldly way. It sounds odd, but the evidence we’ve seen is impossible to ignore). At first Avery believed her Grandie had gone to the dentist and would be coming back soon. We don’t know where this idea came from. Regardless, the first dental appointment I took the kids to afterwards was difficult to say the least. When it became evident that[…]

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Affected By This? Then “Urine” For It!

  Just imagine how many people pee freely in public pools. Wait, don’t. It’s too disgusting. (By the way, experts estimate ONE in FIVE people urinate while swimming. Thank goodness for chlorine and hot showers).  My daughter would happily stay in her grandparents’ pool all day if we let her—minus the dozen or more times she has to get out of the pool to pee. And not just a tinkle. We’re talking bucketfuls. Literally. To save the poor child from drying off every ten minutes to use the toilet, my mum fashioned her a makeshift outdoor-bucket-potty. “AGAIN?! There’s no possible way. She just went.” my husband would exclaim, shaking his head in disbelief. “What do you mean we need to pull over and use the bathroom at the grocery store? We’re almost home, can’t you hold it?” I’d whine, trying hard not to sound pissed off. Pun acknowledged. During swimming lessons Avery has to leave the pool to use the bathroom two to three times at least. We knew there had to be a scientific reason because on dry land, she’s just as dry as a camel, so what gives? My friend Sharon told me she experienced the same thing[…]

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