special needs Archives - Page 5 of 16

Carcinophopia—Fear of Cancer

Feb 04 2016

Did you know today is World Cancer Day? I wasn’t familiar with this event until I saw it on Twitter this morning. Or maybe I did know but chose to stuff it deep down into that place where I keep all my fears about it. And I should tell you, the place is full. It’s busting at the seams because talk of ‘it’ is everywhere. You can probably name at least ten people in your life who’ve been diagnosed. And like me, you may have lost somebody close to you because of it. (I try to not directly refer to ‘it’ by name if I can help it. It’s easier to ignore when it’s unacknowledged.) I’m obviously afraid of it. Unlike a fear of sharks or getting swallowed by a sink hole, this disease is a more statistically plausible threat. We’re a pretty Cancer Phobic society—focused on a killer that may or may not ever come for us. Realistically we’re more likely to die of heart disease in North America than from cancer and yet we hyperfixate on the Big C. Is it any wonder so many of us suffer from Carcinophobia? Cancer is in the news every[…]

Dec 10 2015

Last summer my brother and his family hosted a breast cancer fundraiser in their yard—”FraserFest” was an outdoor concert with bands and food and fun under the stars. But before the stars actually shone, there was rain—crazy heavy rain, strong winds, and even a tornado sighting. To wait out the weather, the adults huddled under the porch while the kids hung out in the basement. When I came downstairs to see what they were doing, I found my daughter encircled by a group of the kindest kids you’ve ever met. Only an hour earlier Avery had been in tears—she couldn’t understand why she couldn’t perform on the stage with the band. “Puh-lease!” she begged. “I want to sing on the stage.” Now, thanks to these big hearted kids, it was her moment and she basked in the glow of the spotlight. Thanks kids. You made this kid’s heart swell. 🙂

Nov 08 2015

Family is everything. I could easily end this post with that. Because when you boil it down, your family loves and supports you. And they go out of their way to make your life better. Mostly. Without my family, I honestly don’t know what I’d do. They make life easier, happier, safer, greater. I love you my family. This weekend my sister-in-law kindly lent us her family. While my handy bro renovated all three of my bathrooms (SO gorgeous… just wait until you see the after photos!) my niece and nephew hung out with us. It was a glorious cousin palooza. Avery is obsessed with her older cousins—not at all surprising considering they teach her so much and make her feel like the most important, most loved kid. When Sunday came and the big kids were packing up to leave, she just couldn’t bear it. So without a word, she slipped upstairs to the music room to express her emotions. With giant tears and her pink ukulele, she composed this song. I snuck upstairs to record her—not to mock her very real pain, but because it was so ridiculously cute, creative, and heartfelt. I simultaneously snort laughed and choked back[…]

The Kindest Thing A Friend Ever Said To Me

Nov 03 2015

The time she baked me a cake. My best friend is a great listener. To be friends with me this past thirty-seven years, she’d have to be. I can be a bit of a windbag. I’m owning it. Unlike me who sometimes spits out words without tasting them first, she chooses her words carefully. She gets why I worry about my special girl. And she knows I’ve struggled to come to terms with the realities of having a child with special needs. She understands how the life I imagined for myself is both exactly and not at all what I had expected. As we sat in her garden, sipping wine, I told her about a family I met several years ago whose daughter then, reminds me so much of my daughter now. My Avery was just a toddler when I met this family at an activity group for kids with a variety of special needs. The girl was about nine—the age Avery is now. She, like Avery, didn’t have any dysmorphic features. At first glance, she appeared pretty typical. It was when she spoke that the disparity between her chronological and developmental age was[…]

Oct 29 2015

My friend Kathy Buckworth invited our daughter to participate in a live-to-air segment she was hosting for a local morning show—CHCH Morning Live. At the risk of sounding like a proud stage mother, Avery (and Kathy!) nailed it. I hesitated when Kathy asked us to take part. The show is LIVE and in accordance to the old adage, “Never work with kids or animals!” I knew this Hallowe’en centred segment could go sideways at the drop of a (witch’s) hat. I also knew my girl would love it. To be in the spotlight and to feel important, if only for 120 seconds… how could I deny her that? Avery is often overlooked for cool experiences on the assumption that kids with differences can’t perform or participate safely or cope with the situation at hand. I get it. I do. However, parents who don’t have the pleasure of parenting a child with developmental disabilities often don’t understand how capable kids can be if only given the chance. KiDS ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN THEIR LABELS. They all shine in their own way. It’s just that not everyone can see that, yet. But I digress…. Thank you K.B. for thinking of[…]

Tag - special needs

Carcinophopia—Fear of Cancer

Avery’s Moment In The Spotlight

Tears Of A Ukulele

The Kindest Thing A Friend Ever Said To Me

When Your Kid With Disabilities Is A Star!