Tag - special needs

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Friends Supporting My Kids—It Takes Village
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Ten Tips for Playdates With Kids of All Abilities
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Beware The Snapping Turtle
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When Your Child Is Shunned
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Life Lessons Learned From Loss

Friends Supporting My Kids—It Takes Village

I wrote a story recently about how one of Avery’s school friends shoed her away on the playground and hurt her little heart in the process. The very next day when we arrived at school, my friend Pat was there waiting at school drop off with this sweet calendar in hand for Avery to cheer her up. (Avery hung it beside her bed and adds a sticker every night before she goes to sleep to mark the days. Sweet AND educational. Gotta love that.)       Then I shared a story with tips for including children with special needs in play dates. The next day this Facebook message appeared. A few private messages back and forth and bam! We have a very special play date on Avery’s new calendar.   I’m not saying you have to be a mom to care about other people’s kids. My friend Ali loves my kids and takes a genuine interest. She has the cutest banter going with Sebastian. She is constantly threatening to “take him down” on the Wii playing field. He laughs and rolls his eyes and loves it. He loves her too. And so does Avery. When I told her Ali had invited[…]

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Ten Tips for Playdates With Kids of All Abilities

My daughter has a personalized CD from Name Your Tune that she just loves. She plays her favourite song “Oh How I Want To Go” over and over. Her brother always laughs at the last line saying, “Mum, that’s like SO inappropriate. They just called Avery special!” Ha. Well, she IS special. In many so ways. The song goes… “They tell me down at your house, it’s always so much fun. You laugh out loud and play a lot and skip and dance and run. Oh I just want to go to Avery’s house. Oh how I want to go… to this house I know… back to my special friend’s home.” Avery is a special friend who may have special needs, but this doesn’t mean she isn’t interested in socializing with her atypical peers. Just the opposite—this girl is one of the most social people I’ve ever met. For many parents, the idea of having a special kiddo to their house for a play date, can be a little scary. In the early days, I accompanied Avery to friend’s houses or to a party. If a parent is nervous, I’m always happy to do it. But honestly, parents don’t have to be[…]

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When Your Child Is Shunned

Conversations like these with my eight-year-old special girl make me want to scoop her up in my arms and then storm down to the playground, finger wagging, to kick some rude kid butt. Me: How was school today? Avery: Good. I made you a card. I did my letters.  Me: Who did you play with at recess? Avery: Katie and Susanna. But Katie say, “Go play with your own friends.” Me: What?! Avery: She say to me, “Go away.”  Me: Silence. Stewing. Blood pressure rising.  Me: So what did you do? Avery: I want to play with Susanna, but Katie say, “Play with your own friends.” Me: So who did you play with? Avery: I just walked around by myself. Avery adores Katie (not her real name). We’ve had her over to our house a lot. But things have changed. Katie who was new to the school last year and didn’t speak English, has friends now—friends she’s not willing to share. This isn’t a post about “mean girls.” It’s old news that kids can be little a-holes. It’s also a fact that kids who are different are often excluded. Different is not “cool” in elementary school. No, this isn’t anything[…]

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Life Lessons Learned From Loss

  2014 was a year flanked on both ends by grief. Our family lost close family members in February and December. There was also the death of a pet in the middle (insignificant in comparison, but try telling that to a sobbing child who has only just recently had his first experience with losing a loved one). I’ve written about how death has affected our children. Insecurities, anxiety and fears have been addressed by talking about our feelings honestly, but age-appropriately. For the most part, the kids are coping and moving forward. Our daughter Avery, eight years old, but cognitively closer to age four, is still struggling with the loss of her Grandie. She talks about her daily. When she’s particularly sad, she makes an “I miss you” card to add to the collection whose intended recipient will never see. Avery dreams about her Grandie a lot and the mornings following those dreams are hard. She’ll cry and ask “why?” There’s really no good answer to that. So she’ll squeeze her eyes shut like her granddad taught her and say, “Grandie is in my heart.” And of course, it breaks my heart. Avery answered the phone last week (her new[…]

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