Tag - parenting

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Her Voice
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A Bittersweet Anniversary and Post Traumatic Stress
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Wait…That May Not Be Chocolate
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I’m Lucky To Be A Stay At Home Mom

Her Voice

  We all want our daughters to have a voice. I need my daughter to have one.  I won’t always be around to speak for her – to explain to others why she may not understand, or to make her understood. Before my daughter was born, deep down I worried there was something wrong. All the prenatal testing indicated she was fine, but sometimes a mother just knows. When she was born, and I held her in my arms, I saw only perfection. I still do. We soon discovered our girl was special. In fact, she’s so unique there isn’t a name for her particular syndrome. She has come miles further than we were told she could. Her future is bright, yet shadowed by developmental and medical challenges. Our daughter doesn’t understand the rude looks or ignorant questions. A stranger’s comment about her “walking funny” results in a carefree smile. Teasing, from a neighbourhood kid earns him a giggle. One day, she will understand and feel the sting of hurtful words and actions. The most important thing I can do to prepare her is to help her to find her voice. My girl is a mess of blonde curls, big brown eyes and pouty pink lips. She’s beautiful. People want[…]

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A Bittersweet Anniversary and Post Traumatic Stress

  This story was originally published in 2010. Avery continues to do well on her anti-seizure meds and life is good. 🙂 It was an ordinary day. If you consider 40 degrees Celsius in May normal. Avery and I dropped big brother at school and went through our day like any other. It was exactly one year since her first seizure—a severe and nearly fatal episode. I never seen a war, but yet I have Soldiers Heart nonetheless. At least that’s what they used to call it. Today we know it as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. PTSD usually develops as a result of a “terribly frightening, highly unsafe or life-threatening experience.” It doesn’t make a difference whose life was threatened – yours or the life of someone you love. People who experience post traumatic stress tend to avoid places, people, or things that remind them of the event. But what happens when you live WITH the person who reminds you of the trauma IN the place where it happened? I tell you what happens; you avoid thinking about that event, ever. If you find yourself feeling any emotions related to said event, you crack a joke, call a friend or[…]

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Wait…That May Not Be Chocolate

Know what pisses me off? Running to the bathroom after filling a shriveled bladder with vast amounts of green tea only to find somebody (I won’t mention any names, but she’s blonde and lives in my house) has peed on the seat. You frantically grab a wad of toilet paper to mop up the mess so you can take your rightful spot on the throne, but your bladder has already started the downloading process. It’s that whole Pavlovian thing in action. So you wet your pants. And for no good reason. It’s not like you were having fun and laughing so hard you peed a little. Sorry. I’ve got pee on the brain, so to speak. These days our household is consumed with pee. And poop. We’re in the midst of potty training booty camp. DS was fully potty trained by the age of two. It took a week. I used a cleverly organized sticker system and Potty Champ reward chart. I was the one who deserved a reward…for super stellar parenting. Seriously? I was a fool. DS was just a good pee-er. It had nothing to do with me. At all. My daughter has made that abundantly clear. She’s[…]

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I’m Lucky To Be A Stay At Home Mom

If you’d told me that one day I’d leave my job to be a stay at home mom, I never would have believed it. I went to school to be a teacher dammit. I’ve always wanted to be a teacher. As if I’d give that up… Of course I love my kids and I want to be with them. But not like, all the time. I’d always planned to parent AND work—in perfect balance. Because that’s totally doable, right? I thoroughly enjoyed mat leaves with both my babies, but knowing I’d soon be back at work made it easier to enjoy every moment. The light at the end of the tunnel shone bright. Mid-way through my mat leave with my second child, daycare was set up, schedules were organized and I was ready to go back to the classroom I loved, to a job I was really good at, blissfully unaware that things were about to change. At 8 months, our daughter became very ill and was hospitalized. Avery was diagnosed with a rare (as in one-of-a-kind-where-in-the-hell-did-this-come-from-holy-shit) genetic condition. Doctors didn’t have much information so we had no idea what to expect. The geneticist painted a grim picture, tossing out gems like,[…]

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