Tag - just for fun

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Salutation Humiliation
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Ladders and Dadders and Bros
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Blood Bath?
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Imagination Overload
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It’s A New Meme…Verbose Vendredi!

Salutation Humiliation

Do you ever think to yourself, “Self, why are you such a dork?“   I do.   Like last week, as I enthusiastically waved at a friend across the vast veggie section the Super Store. The “friend” looked at me with one brow raised. This made me smile bigger and wave harder, as though by upping the ante, they’d recognize me. Well, it’s hard to recognize somebody when you’ve never met them. I was waving at a total stranger. How embarrassing though not quite as embarrassing as greeting someone’s wave with a toothy grin and happy return wave, only to realize they’re not waving at you, but the person directly behind you.    My friend and I were discussing this humbling situation the other night and exchanged stories of past salutation humiliation. For the rest of the night I waved at her from across the room and when she smiled back, I shook my head and pretended to point to someone over her shoulder. It only took about 3 or 4 of these faux waves before she caught on. She’s one of my prettiest friends.    Yesterday as I was returning from an appointment with my daughter, I decided to[…]

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Ladders and Dadders and Bros

    As I sit here at my desk, gazing out the window deciding what to tackle next—update my resume, answer emails, work on our taxes—my eyes fall upon my neighbour who is perched high upon a ladder; clearly taking advantage of the mild weather, he’s taking down his Christmas lights. Naturally this reminds me of the battle my dad fought and lost with an unruly ladder. Forget the taxes, I’m going to share this story instead. My parents live near by and I pop over often. On this particular day I had stopped in without the kids for whatever reason. I was in the kitchen putting on the kettle for tea when I happened to glance out the bay window. It was at this exact moment that I witnessed my father riding a ladder from the crest of the roof, down to the pavement. Wearing slippers instead of sturdy shoes was his first mistake. The second was neglecting to ask someone to hold the ladder securely on the sloped driveway while he strung the Christmas lights. The bottom of the ladder slid away from the house on the slippery pavement and my dad plummeted face first to the ground. He[…]

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Blood Bath?

Bath time is sweet and peaceful at our house. Honestly, it’s one of the most treasured parts of the day. It’s also the time when my husband takes over. That’s right, he bathes our daughter while I surf the web, chat on the phone, paint my nails, help myself to seconds of dessert and cue up Blooper clips on You Tube. Yes, it’s a truly magical time. The other night as Avery splashed and I sloshed (my wine), my husband called me into the bathroom. “Lis, you have to come see this!” So I put my online Scrabble game on hold and put in an appearance. It was the least I could do. I did after all just eat the last ice cream bar. My husband’s ice cream bar. It was delicious. Aw… Avery was happily drawing on the tiled walls in the tub. It’s okay, she was using the soap crayons Santa brought her. Seriously fun for kids by the way. Those, and the spongy ABC letters that stick to the wall are fantastic. If you have an emergent speller, get some. They’re great. Just look at how hard she’s working. She even spelled her name. Amazing.  Good, clean[…]

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Imagination Overload

A vivid imagination is a good thing if you’re J.K. Rowling or Walt Disney. For me, it can be a bit of a problem.  The wind rattling the window at night is for most, the wind rattling the window. For me, it’s a frothy mob of rabid raccoons working themselves into a lather struggling to make their way into our house to attack me in my bed. A plane flying low over head signals an aircraft coming in for a landing. I hear that thunderous hum and duck for cover, certain that it will crash land in a ball of fire in our backyard at any moment. The average recreational walker does not scream like a sissy when being overtaken by a jogger. How could I be sure I wasn’t being chased by a mugger? His Nikes were pounding the pavement hard and accelerating rapidly so I don’t think my assumption was unfounded. Okay, maybe trying to swat him with my shopping bag was a bit much, but still. Do you see what I’m dealing with here? And scary movies? I stupidly watched Paranormal Activity I, II and III and haven’t slept soundly since. I’m still getting over the whole[…]

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It’s A New Meme…Verbose Vendredi!

I’ve participated in Wordless Wednesday, but almost always unsuccessfully. I’m rarely wordless. I even talk in my sleep. So I’ve created a new meme —Verbose Vendredi. I planned on calling it “Wordy Wednesday” but since it’s now Friday, I added the french bit for you know, alliteration, which is a key element in all viral memes. Isn’t it? I honestly have no idea. I don’t even know how to pronounce the word meme. Is it ‘meem’ or ‘mem’? Now that I think about it, I should’ve I added MEME to the hate list… Anyway, a few chatty girlfriends and I got together for a good ol’ blab session and came up with this word list; words that make us smile and words that get stuck in our throats and make us gag. Do you see any of your most beloved or deeply despised words here? Any suggestions for ones we missed? Verbose Vendredi Related: Lisa’s Lexicon (words I made up that don’t exist in a dictionary but should)

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