Tag - grieving

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Need Comfort? I’m Probably Not Your Best Bet
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Levity During Loss—thank you for the flours

Need Comfort? I’m Probably Not Your Best Bet

Shortly before 6 AM on a Sunday morning our daughter came into our room sobbing. “I had a bad dream,” she cried. As she lay with us, the phone rang and we learned that my husband’s mum had passed away at 5:55 AM. Avery and her Grandie were so deeply connected in life, it makes sense to me that they were connected at the end.   When a loved one dies it’s a blessing for them if it’s quick—to go without suffering. But for those left behind, it’s heart wrenching. So how do people get through it? There’s no right or wrong way. Actually, that’s not exactly true. When you’re trying to comfort your grieving husband, there things you should definitely not do. For example, the day my husband’s mum died we sat on the couch exhausted, unable to do anything but stare. Avery wanted to play but we just couldn’t. Then I remembered I’d picked up some movies from the library earlier in the week so I popped one in the DVD player to keep her occupied. When I noticed my mistake, it was too late. The movie I had chosen was Up! If you know the sentimental story,[…]

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Levity During Loss—thank you for the flours

My brother made the drive from Michigan to Ontario to be with us for my mother-in-law’s memorial service. Before he left he called to see what I’d like him to bring. I asked for my favourite flour—whole wheat but made from white wheat kernels—perfect for bread and pancakes, but I can’t seem to find it here in Canada.   When he arrived and offered his condolences, I hugged him as he passed me the two bags of King Arthur. “Thanks for the flours.” I said through tears. And then we laughed. The ridiculousness of this statement brought some much needed levity to an otherwise somber situation.   My brother-in-law flew home from overseas last week and he’s been making us laugh since he got home. His stories about his mom and all the good times has brought both laughter and tears — honouring her this way is helping us begin to heal. My son is having a difficult time accepting that his “Grandie” is really gone. But talking about her and remembering the special moments is helping him cope. He has vowed to keep her memory alive for his younger cousins and little sister. My daughter knows her Grandie is[…]

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