1
The Case Of The Over-Acting Hands
2
Getting A Little Too Jolly….
3
Tooth Fairy Meets The Elf
4
Merry Frantic Christmas
5
Merry…

The Case Of The Over-Acting Hands

As you may know, our family had an elf living with us for the month of December. He was sent from the North Pole to keep an eye on things and to report back to Santa. Outside of a small altercation with the tooth fairy, things went smoothly and we were sad to see him leave us on Christmas Eve. We said our goodbyes and took comfort in knowing that we’ll see Quacky again next December. Our elf visitor took a seat beside the cookies and milk to wait for Santa to retrieve him. What happened next was truly astounding. We set the laptop webcam on record and went to bed. This is the incredible footage the children saw Christmas morning…Click Here: Santa’s Visit The kids were floored! Our son’s reaction was priceless. It nearly brought me to tears. Ah, to be young and to believe… That brilliant performance was given by my talented bro-in-law. Julian, thank you for making such a sweet memory for our kids (and for eating 16 cookies in the process). Julian had to step in because my husband, who came up with the video idea, could NOT perform without causing us to collapse in fits of[…]

Read More

Getting A Little Too Jolly….

For the love of god why did I stop running??? This summer I was on such a roll. Now I simply HAVE rolls. In three short months I have undone all of my hard work. I trained for and ran a 15km race last August. I was feeling fit and fab. Now I’m fat and drab. If I don’t get back on track soon, I’ll be trading in my Victoria Secrets for these unmentionables… I’m no spring chicken over here. As the big 4-0 looms I know I need to get moving and stay motivated. This is why my yearly New Year’s resolutions have come early this year – etched in chalk on the kitchen wall. My husband was literally laughing out loud as he watched me write these affirmations. He also shouted out a few he’d like me to add. They were funny. Really funny. I asked his permission to include them in this blog. Not gonna happen. I can say however that two of his suggestions are described rather graphically on Urban Dictionary and one I’m pretty sure, is illegal. What are your New Year’s Resolutions?

Read More

Tooth Fairy Meets The Elf

Have you heard of the Elf on the Shelf? An elf is sent from the North Pole to keep an eye on the children of the house and report back to Santa. Currently we have an elfin house guest named “Quacky” (don’t ask…his name is a stupid story within a stupid story) living with us. Every night our son tucks Quacky into the little bed he made for him in his bookcase. Each morning, he wakes to discover the elf is missing. When the family is asleep, this inanimate elf becomes “real”. He sneaks out of bed and gets into all sorts of mischief. He also uses the phone to call Santa…long distance. Occasionally he uses my computer to shoot Santa an email update (I’m not sure, but I think he has also been logging onto some nasty elf porn sites). We are having a hoot moving the elf around the house and staging him in different scenarios before we go to bed (don’t you just LOVE the legit lies we’re encouraged to tell our children around the holidays?). The other night my husband and I were killing ourselves laughing at some of the completely inappropriate situations we thought about[…]

Read More

Merry Frantic Christmas

With the joy of the season, comes the frantic, hectic hell that is life for women everywhere this time of year. That doesn’t mean men don’t feel stressed during the holidays. Oh wait, yes it means exactly that, since Christmas is a WOMAN’S burden. “Burden” isn’t a very festive term I know. My husband would be more than happy to do anything I asked of him, but due to my sick need to control everything, the man is rarely asked to lift a finger. This black hole of shopping, list making, cooking, cleaning and wrapping despair, was dug by yours truly. So I need to shut up, suck it up and get on with it because… …the holidays are jam packed with “memory moments” and I don’t want to miss any of them. It’s cliché and obvious, but these times go by in a blink of an eye. Our children won’t remember if the boughs on the banister were perfectly hung or if the napkin rings at Christmas dinner all matched. They WILL remember dressing up like elves in the basement, skating on the backyard rink and putting on a “Christmas Musical Extravaganza” in the living room. This is what[…]

Read More

Merry…

Yesterday in our son’s grade one class the teacher asked each child to share one special activity they enjoy over the holidays. Our son said, “We do that thing, you know, where you do it once every night before the holiday comes. I can’t remember what that thing is called.” “A menorah?” asked the teacher. “Yes.” He answered. “So you celebrate Hanukkah?” she asked him. “Yes. Yes we do,” he said. Oh holy Hosanna. The activity he was looking for was, opening a door of the advent calendar! “Do we celebrate Kwanzaa mummy?” he asked us later that day. “No hun, we don’t.” “Why?” he asked. “Well, we’re not from Africa,”I explained. “Do you hafta be from Africa?? Can’t we celebrate it anyway.” “Um. I guess we can.” *Mental note: buy some black, red and green candles… Merry Hanukwanzza everyone! 😉

Read More

All images and text are copyright © 2017 Forever In Mom Genes