Category - parenting

1
Use These Potty Training Incentives To Achieve Toiletting Triumph
2
Invited—When Your Child With Special Needs Gets A Birthday Invitation
3
Linguini Facial
4
Sometimes
5
Close Your Eyes And Make A Wish
6
The Truth Fairy
7
Difficult Conversations With My Child – Part 2
8
Zack
9
Slap Those Spuds—Embarrassing Kids Moments
10
When Christmas Isn’t Exactly Merry…

Use These Potty Training Incentives To Achieve Toiletting Triumph

  My girl likes to potty all the time, potty all the time, potty all the tah-hime! Well, NOW she does anyway. For the first 51/2 years of her life she wasn’t on board with the whole toilet sitch.    Potty training ANY child takes time and patience and patience. Did I mention patience? Potty training a child with developmental delays is even more “special.”  I wrote about past Herculean efforts to get this girl out of diapers and into some stylin’ Dora underpants here (tricks like these generally work wonders for most kids). Alas we tried, we failed, and we did a sh*t load of laundry. She just wasn’t ready. Over the Christmas holidays we tried again. This time instead of sinking into the bowels of hell, we were triumphant. It’s slightly ridiculous, but here’s what worked: We choose a quiet week where we would be at home most of the time. I told Avery there were lots of babies who needed diapers and asked if it would be okay to give them hers? Of course, she said NO!  This girl has a serious Pull-Up addiction. When I hid her diapers anyway, she tore the house apart looking for them.[…]

Read More

Invited—When Your Child With Special Needs Gets A Birthday Invitation

It happened. Finally, joyfully, my five year old atypical child received her first ever invitation to a typical peer’s birthday party. She tore open the envelope and exclaimed wide eyed, “I party!” “I so happy,” she said while I cried big, sobby tears. “Mummy sad?” she asked, looking concerned. No my sweet girl. I’m not sad. I’m thrilled for you. You deserve so much—fun and parties and all the great things that come with having friends who love you, for you. I want to tell this *mother, the one who sent the invitation, how much this means. I’m sure she has no idea. Avery has carried the invitation around with her all morning and won’t put it down. And now she wants to go out, like right now, and buy her friend a “bir-day pwsent.” The happiness on this child’s face and the excitement pulsing through her body reminds me, because sometimes I forget, that life is truly a celebration.  Party on big girl. *I sent the mom an email to explain how much this invitation meant to us and to sincerely thank her. I also hugged her (hard and possibly a tiny bit too long) at the party.   […]

Read More

Linguini Facial

I made a healthy, home-freaking-made-from-scratch meal and I was ready to impale myself on a dull spoon midway through dinner. My little girl eats like a bird. A baby humming bird.   Lately we’ve made great strides, both in food diversity and in weight gain. It’s a roller coaster—good days and bad. I’m okay with that. But, when your child refuses to eat something she normally loves, it’s irritating. For the love, who refuses linguini??   I tried everything. All of our usual tricks. Even our latest and greatest… paying off each bite with a butterscotch CHIPIT.   I can handle a little food refusal. What I can’t handle is when my child wrestles her dish (which was suction cupped to the table for stability) with such furry and determination that it launches suddenly upwards, flinging the entire meal like an aerial assault by an army of searing hot saucy snakes, into her mother’s face. I enjoy a facial, but I draw the line at a pesto prima vera treatment.    I threw in the towel, after wiping away the sauce with it, and retreated to my office, leaving daddy to deal with the pasta shrapnel. Tomorrow would be a[…]

Read More

Sometimes

Sometimes when you have too much to say, you end up saying nothing at all. I’ve tried to write many times this week. But instead of writing a word, I clicked “close” every time.   Sometimes when life is too hard, you shut yourself off. You assure everyone around you that everything is fine and you try to believe it.    I feel guilty because others have struggles much harder than my own. I have a child with special needs. So what? So do many, many other parents. Our story is not unique. Avery is healthy and happy and beautiful and I should feel lucky. Or so I have been told. But some days, instead of lucky, I feel frightened, frustrated, angry or sad.   I’ve always had the attitude that everything will be okay. This is our normal and life is good. It’s not perfect, but it’s good. It seems you can only go on for so long fooling yourself into thinking your life isn’t hard.  My life is hard. Avery is funny and loving, but she’s difficult. She doesn’t understand “danger.” She is always at risk and it’s taxing living in a constant state of fight or flight.[…]

Read More

Close Your Eyes And Make A Wish

Our daughter is nearly five years old and she’s never been to a children’s birthday party. She understands what a party involves. She’s had plenty of exposure to birthday cake, candles, balloons, ripping open birthday wrap, and celebrating. But only ever with family.    In two years of preschool I’ve seen invitations passed around to every girl in the class but mine. Now with her first year of Kindergarten drawing to a close, I assume at least one child in her class has had a birthday party. Maybe I’m wrong. Perhaps every child was born in the summer? This doesn’t directly impact my child. She doesn’t know she’s being excluded. But it impacts me. I may be too sensitive (or so I’ve been told) but I definitely feel the sting of rejection on her behalf. I find myself wanting to shout, “What the hell people?”  Alas, I can’t force people to include her. It’s their choice. So I say nothing.  Though, I’d like to just say this… If there’s a child with a disability in your child’s class, please don’t overlook them. You might assume they can’t go to a party due to mobility or behavioural issues. Maybe you think they pose a[…]

Read More

The Truth Fairy

How long is it acceptable for your child to believe in the Tooth Fairy? My son is nearly eight and fully believes a magical winged creature breaks and enters into our home to purchase his grungy teeth to add to her toothy collection. It’s a bizarre concept right?   Yesterday my son had four teeth extracted. Poor kid has been cursed with his mother’s toothy grin – too many teeth, not enough jaw. The dentist has a plan to make room for incomers to minimize the impending overcrowding. My boy was a little nervous, but the anticipation of the Tooth Fairy’s bounty overshadowed his fear.    Last night, after examining his tiny teeth for the umpteenth time, he carefully stowed them inside his tooth keeper and tucked it under his pillow. A few hours later, an extremely tired Tooth Fairy tippy toed (loudly) into his dark bedroom. I deftly (not even close) removed the tooth keeper and promptly dropped it on the floor. After retrieving the tooth case from under the bed, I stood up ready to make my escape but cracked my head on the underside of the bunk bed. FYI, the Tooth Fairy has a mouth on her[…]

Read More

Difficult Conversations With My Child – Part 2

Forget the babbling brook, I’m a rambling river. I’m not sure why I feel compelled to tell people everything. Maybe it’s the need to vent, to seek feedback, validation, advice, a laugh. Who knows? But if loose lips sink ships, I should really have my own personal Coast Guard.   I may over-share on a regular basis within my social network (and the occasional innocent bystander at the grocery check-out) but I am able to curtail my TMI tendencies when it comes to my kids.   Children hang on our every word. WHAT we say and HOW we say it—it’s our job to try to insulate our kids from worry, horror, despair, and unthinkable sadness.   We can’t completely shelter our children from the harsh realities of life. But if possible we can try to shield them from the really scary sh*t so they can feel safe and secure for as long as possible.    This is why I chose initially not to tell my son that Zack passed away.   The boys never met in person, but my son knew about Zack and his family. He knew Zack was Avery’s friend. He heard me speak about Zack’s parents. He knew[…]

Read More

Zack

My thoughts this week have been consumed by my friend Heather and her beautiful boy Zackie. Zack is at Sick Kids Hospital battling pneumonia and Influenza. Last night the physical toll was too much and his heart stopped. Zack is now on life support.   There is nothing more gut wrenching for a parent than witnessing their child in peril. Helpless and terrified can’t begin to describe what Heather and her family must be feeling right now.   Tonight, my son and I put aside our regular bedtime story and together we visited Heather’s blog. We looked at pictures and watched videos of Zack and his two brothers.   Zack, your mummy says you’re a fighter. Please fight. We adore your smile and your laugh. We would all love nothing more than to hear it again soon.    If you’d like to leave Heather and her family a note of encouragement, you can do so at Wishes For Heather.

Read More

Slap Those Spuds—Embarrassing Kids Moments

It was getting close to lunch so my dad and I decided to brave the Ikea cafeteria on a recent outing. Despite a few embarrassing kid moments (we always seem to cause a scene in the Ikea dining room) we gave it a go. The food is delicious and so inexpensive, it’s practically free.   We brought our meatballs laden plates to a table and sat down. My daughter Avery was fully engrossed in her mac & cheese until a couple walked past our table. The woman caught Avery’s attention. She caught mine too. She had to be in her seventies and was rocking skin tight pleather pants. You go girl. As her husband brushed past, Avery reached out and patted his bum (this was not the first time Avery has fondled a strange man’s bottom by the way). At least she didn’t grab his “meat balls!” 🙂   He whipped his head around and looked directly at me! “It was her, I swear!” I exclaimed pointing at the kid with the macaroni noodle stuck to her cheesy chin. He looked back and forth between us and I’m not convinced he believed me. Seriously dude. If I was going to[…]

Read More

When Christmas Isn’t Exactly Merry…

The holidays are a tiring, stressful, hectic time set smack in the midst of dreary winter. Unless you’re a child filled with wonder, Christmas can become more of a chore than a joy. But as parents we do our best to ensure our kids have a happy and memorable holiday, filled with the excitement we experienced in our own childhoods. Christmas morning at our house this year was filled with amazement and laughter. For the first time, Avery “got” Christmas. She was in awe of each present and her brother was floored by his gifts. It was, dare I say, magical. It wasn’t until Christmas night that mummy unraveled, just a little. Fa la la la la, sob, sob, sob wah. Avery did well sitting at the kids’ table at my in-laws’ and I actually got to eat my entire turkey dinner. Pretty much. Come dessert however, she was overtired, overstimulated and overwhelmed. In lieu of dessert and conversation, Avery and I went home so the rest of the family could visit. Getting her into her car seat was a struggle and a flailing arm made contact with my eye. I *may* have growled slightly. FYI: A sick and tired[…]

Read More

All images and text are copyright © 2019 Forever In Mom Genes