Archive - 2016

1
Superbowl Sunday Super Easy Snack—Football Brownie Bites
2
Carcinophopia—Fear of Cancer
3
Stay Back! Hormone Zone Ahead
4
Let’s Partner
5
Take Heed Neighbour! Don’t Get Burned!
6
On The Eve Of Your Wedding…
7
Resolve to Resolve—It’s Not The End Of The World

Superbowl Sunday Super Easy Snack—Football Brownie Bites

Lazy? Busy? Baking Challenged? I’m all three, so I made these super easy, super fast, super tasty, Superbowl Sunday snacks to bring to a party tonight. 1. Buy a container of Two-Bite Brownies.  2. Wash hands. Obvi. Squash round brownies into oblong football (close enough) shapes.  3. Pipe on white icing for laces.  Ta dah! Go Eagles! Or whoever is playing. I don’t actually follow football, but any excuse for a party…and brownies…

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Carcinophopia—Fear of Cancer

Did you know today is World Cancer Day? I wasn’t familiar with this event until I saw it on Twitter this morning. Or maybe I did know but chose to stuff it deep down into that place where I keep all my fears about it. And I should tell you, the place is full. It’s busting at the seams because talk of ‘it’ is everywhere.   You can probably name at least ten people in your life who’ve been diagnosed. And like me, you may have lost somebody close to you because of it. (I try to not directly refer to ‘it’ by name if I can help it. It’s easier to ignore when it’s unacknowledged.) I’m obviously afraid of it. Unlike a fear of sharks or getting swallowed by a sink hole, this disease is a more statistically plausible threat. We’re a pretty Cancer Phobic society—focused on a killer that may or may not ever come for us. Realistically we’re more likely to die of heart disease in North America than from cancer and yet we hyperfixate on the Big C. Is it any wonder so many of us suffer from Carcinophobia?   Cancer is in the news every[…]

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Stay Back! Hormone Zone Ahead

My hormones are wonky. Not in a cute, “Aw, she tears up at the idea of baby bunnies” way, but in a “Settle down shrew. I AM NOT breathing too loud, I’m just… breathing! Jesus.” sort of way. Apparently a few days a month Lisa leaves the building and a satanic, salt sucking, chocolate guzzlin’ troll takes her place. Last night for example, I was having a pleasant discussion with my spouse. One minute we were two adults chatting, laughing even—the next, the poor man said something I didn’t agree with so I spun on my heel and whipped opened the cupboard and grabbed a package of chocolate chips. I shoved a mittful into my mouth and fumed until I was ready to continue the conversion. What hell is this? If this is perimenopause, what is full-blown menopause going to be like? I am sincerely concerned. I’ve had this discussion with hordes of girlfriends and we’re all on the same page. Collectively we’re a happy, gregarious group who upon occasion and somewhat dependent upon the tides, can suddenly transform into something else—something dark and startlingly emotional. Add in a dose of insomnia (also associated with whacky hormones) and resulting sleep[…]

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Let’s Partner

Lisa Thornbury is a former Toronto elementary school teacher, turned lifestyle, parenting, and special needs advocate blogger and freelance writer. She provides original and syndicated content for online magazines and websites, and puts her weight behind social media programs.

 

Please Note: Lisa rarely speaks in the third person in real life. Lisa thinks referring to herself in the third person is weird. Though, Lisa isn’t completely adverse to weird. 

Areas of expertise…
  • Articles for online and print media.
  • Content created specifically for your website or program.
  • Ghost writing. It’s not as scary as it sounds.
  • Product/service reviews published on my blog or your website. 
  • Sponsored social posts for Twitter, Instagram, Facebook.
  • Relatable voice and attention to detail.
  • Sometimes I’m funny. FYI—I swear a lot while I’m working, but curse words only make it into my writing when it’s a  f*cking integral part of the story. 

In case you’re bored, here’s more about me…

Relevant: 

As well as managing a popular blog of my own, I create unique and colourful content for numerous websitesnand social media channels. My creative style lends itself well to a social climate where readers are drawn to humour, integrity and transparency. 

I enjoy witty social banter and I’m well versed in the complexities of the social media landscape. I understand how to effectively share your brand’s message in this dynamic digital space. 

Somewhat Relevant:

  • I live near Toronto with my husband, two children, a fat orange cat, and a sassy Yorkie. 
  • I have degrees in Anthropology and Sociology from McMaster University, as well as a Bachelor of Science in Education from The University of Maine.
  • Sometimes I miss teaching, but then I go on a field trip with my daughter’s class and I get over it pretty quick. 

Irrelevant but a good time killer if you’re reading this on your phone waiting for a bus:

Take Heed Neighbour! Don’t Get Burned!

I love snuggling up beside our gas fireplace during the winter. It’s the coziest. However, ever since the incident when our daughter backed up into the hot glass and scorched her leg, the unit has sat cold and flameless. Avery is now nine and she understands the concept of “danger” and “don’t touch that” and “it’s hot” so it’s safe to turn the gas back on and fire it up! When we flipped the switch this season, nothing happened. It’s was all very anti-climatic. My husband examined the fireplace innards which involved head scratching, random grunting noises, followed by some cursing—fun to watch, but not effective in terms of igniting my flame. My man is a lot of awesome things. A fireplace repairman is not one of them. On this quest for fire I hired a company take a look. The service guy arrived promptly and was polite and seemed efficient. He removed a decade’s worth of nasty spider webs and crud from the fireplace and cleaned the glass on the door. I paid for him to do this not knowing how easy it is to do myself. Dammit. He claimed the pilot assembly part was corroded and pointed to[…]

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On The Eve Of Your Wedding…

You are getting married tomorrow!! Holy *$%#!! Yesterday you were just a little thing, sitting on your big cousin’s lap… my tweed-gaucho-pant-lap. Let’s not even discuss the neon Aztec print sweater and banana clipped spiral perm. And now you’re all grown up, soon to be a bride. It breaks my heart that I’m not going to be there, Kels. But you know how thrilled we are for you and we’ll wing our way there one day. So put a shrimp on the barbie and have a few roos and crocs on standby for our arrival. I’m over the moon that both you and your sis have found such amazing partners—I couldn’t have handpicked better for you—kind, funny as hell, outdoorsy, super handsome—these guys are the full package. And it goes without saying how lucky they are to have found you. While we may not be there in person to watch you walk down the aisle, we’re cheering you on with so much joy and excitement as you venture down this life path—such a sweet path paved with so much love. And with that, here are a few words about this life contract called marriage—from my experience anyway. 1. Grandma Fraser[…]

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Resolve to Resolve—It’s Not The End Of The World

I NEVER make new year resolutions. And with that staunch declaration,here are my new year resolutions: 1.  Never say never.  Facebook is currently flooded with warnings about how resolutions set up you to fail. Whether it’s called goal setting, or a creating a “life plan”, or just zeroing in on areas to improve upon, I’m making some adjustments this year. Nothing earth shattering. Just a few means to a more happy, healthy, successful end. Why now? Why not? 2. Get my pre-bed routine down from infinity to five minutes or less. 3. Walk more, drive less. 4. Deal with that thing that’s been getting in my way. 5. Gather up the nerve and ask her to be my mentor. 6. Eat more vegan, less “ish.” 7. Can it! As in, my mum and I are going to can fresh veggies. We’ve already created a Pinterest board so we’re well on our way. 8. Drink more water, less fermented grapes. It’s not that I think booze is bad, but there comes a time when you have to wonder how your liver is holding up. 9. Take better photos and back them up. 10. Leave my iPhone in the charger downstairs at[…]

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