We’re just home from a few weeks away and I’m behind in basically everything—work, errands, housework. So naturally instead of facing reality, I’m cruising the internet pinning recipes I don’t have the ingredients for, bookmarking household projects I’ll never get to even if I had the tools or skills to do them, and reading quotes—nauseating inspirational preachings that actually make me think.
Dammit. I don’t have time for reflection.
These toilets aren’t going to clean themselves. By the way, why hasn’t anyone come up with something for that yet? Not just that blue liquid that auto-dispenses into the bowl. I mean, a toilet that actually disinfects the scunge under the seat with blue light technology or something. The lady across the street has Molly Maid in once a week to scrub her scunge. I think it might be easier to just drop some Molly and maybe if you drop it (or do you smoke it?) you won’t even notice or care how dirty your house is. Hellohhh, Molly Maid.
Anyway, I was reading some quotes just now and had an epiphany—maybe the way to live life in complete harmonious balance is all in the numbers? Instead of feeding my children or folding laundry or answering that work email that has been sitting in my inbox all morning, I’ve been working on this—what I believe might be the formula for life perfected. I know, goosebumps, right?
Counting Down from five…
So that’s it then. Just remember these five quotes and life is golden.
Hey, did you see my latest Pinterest fail? “Pinterest, Why Can’t I Quit You?”