My Break Up With Joe and Why We’re Getting Back Together

 

I gave up coffee and now I mourn it every morn.

You might be thinking, “Why would you give it up in the first place (you stupid self masochistic woman)?”

It’s because of the jitters. That may sound like a fun 1950s musical group, but I assure you, the jitters ain’t fun. I’ve been on edge, worried about things — things I can’t possibly control. I thought by eliminating caffeine I might at least be able to control those pesky jitters, at least a little.

So bye-bye coffee, hello pissed off, tired, she-bitch.

It’s not like I drank a lot of coffee. One cup a day. Maybe two on the weekend. I’ve been off the sacred brown elixir (with the exception of a few half cafs) for a month now. And the jitters? They’re still there, lurking. I suspect they’ll remain until I learn to cope better with the stress that goes hand in hand with parenthood and WAHM-hood and general life-hood.

So this morning I’m sitting here, sipping my herbal tea scrolling through my Facebook
feed and I see this Reader’s Digest article, touting the benefits of
coffee.

*Eyes Widen, Mouth Waters, Heartbeat Quickens*

It seems I broke up with coffee prematurely. In fact, we need to get back together…immediately! Here’s why:

When was the last time you heard a doctor use the word miracle? Well, wake up and smell the coffee: “It’s amazing,” says liver specialist Sanjiv Chopra, MD, professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School. “Coffee is truly a lifesaving miracle drug.” 

Though he says it’s still a “scientific mystery” how a simple cup of coffee works its wonders in the body, large epidemiological studies repeatedly verify its astonishing benefits. Some recent research highlights:

• More than three cups a day lowers women’s risk of developing the most common skin cancer by 20 percent.

• Drinking at least one cup of coffee a day lowers women’s risk of stroke by up to 25 percent.

• Consuming at least two cups daily reduces women’s chances of becoming depressed by up to 20 percent.

This is an excerpt from Dr. Sanjiv Chopra’s article. Read the full story here.

If you’re looking for me, I’ll be at Starbucks.

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