Archive - January 2010

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My My, What Sparkly Porridge You Have
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Yummy Granola
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How I Almost Ruined Christmas

My My, What Sparkly Porridge You Have

I feel like Goldilocks living in this house filled with porridge lovers. I realize oatmeal is healthy and everything, but it’s gross. I’m a texture person. Porridge is a gruely mixture somewhere between vomit and lumpy soup. I’m not a big fan. Give me oatmeal cookies, crunchy oaty granola, even Hall and Oats, but keep your porridge to yourself. My husband (aka Papa Bear) continues to ignore my pleas and has been making a LARGE pot of oatmeal every morning. He eats it. The kids eat it. And I’m guilted into eating it. “It’s good for you! It’ll fill you up. Lower your cholesterol..blah, blah, blah…” he lectures. So, I’ve been a good Little Miss Muffet, eating what I’ve been given. Oh wait, Miss Muffet ate curds and whey, not porridge. Whatever. Equally disgusting. Yesterday, I drew the line when Papa Bear asked, “So? How is it?” “Fine” I muttered, “but I could do without the sparkly bits. What are those anyway?” “Oh ya. I tried to scoop out as much as I could.” Papa Bear explained. He had added the baggie of “Reindeer Food” (oats mixed with red, green and silver craft sparkles) Avery and I had made to[…]

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Yummy Granola

  I’ve been wearing Birkenstoks since before they became trendy. I’ve been known to hug the odd tree now and then. And, I LOVE granola. Here’s a tasty and healthy recipe that I make all the time courtesy of my BFF who lives in Vancouver so clearly, she is WAY more “granola” than I am. I buy most of these ingredients in bulk. The Bulk Barn now carries many organic items. Granola Crunch Makes 8 cups. Heat 1/2 cup of honey in a large pot. Once the honey has melted… Add: 1 cup oats 1 cup millet 1 cup sesame seeds 1 cup pumpkin seeds 1 cup sunflower seeds 1 cup sliced almonds 1/2 cup flax seeds (optional) 1 cup shredded unsweetened coconut 1/2 cup raisins or dried cranberries/blueberries 2 tsp vanilla extract 1 tsp cinnamon zest of one orange (optional) * I sometimes leave out the almonds and pumpkin seeds to make this granola more toddler friendly aka less “chokey” Mix until all ingredients are coated. At this point you can also add 1/2 cocoa powder for a chocolatey version. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and spread the granola out flat onto two cookie sheets and bake for[…]

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How I Almost Ruined Christmas

This Christmas I was deliriously ill. Seems I’ve become a pretty pathetic feeble germ bag. Anyway, it’s my excuse for nearly spoiling our carefully crafted “Elf” illusion. After Santa “retrieved” his loyal elf on Christmas Eve, I hid him away in a temporary hiding spot in my underwear drawer where he remained nestled amongst my delicate underthings, undetected until…five days after Christmas. I was feeling better and decided to tackle the laundry. As I was sorting socks and putting clothes into my dresser, I heard a gasp. It wasn’t my husband, horrified by the sight of my granny underpants. It was my son exclaiming, “Mum! Look!! It’s the elf. He’s in your drawer!” Me: “Ohhhh. About that…(think Lisa, think!!) I got an email from Santa apologizing for not taking the elf with him. He was running late and was distracted and accidentally left the elf behind. He asked if you’d mind looking after Elf for one more day until he can send one of his people to pick him up tonight?” (This is what was passing over my fibbing lips, but running through my head was: Nooooooo! Shit, shit, shit. Stupid moron!! I’ve ruined Christmas!!). *Expectant pause. Please buy it.[…]

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