Toxic Friendships

 

A small rant if I may?

One long, deep, cleansing breath. Inhale and…

…girlfriends. Can’t live without them. Well you could, but life would be a bore. Plus who would give you the straight-up truth in the RW & Co. change room about what those pants REALLY do to your bum? You really can’t afford to go through life without some solid women by your side. They build you up when you’re low, and come along for the ride when you’re riding high. But what if they don’t?

What happens when a friendship takes a turn or just plain fizzles out?

We’ve all had our hearts stomped on; our confidence shredded into tiny shards by men in our lives at one time or another. But what about the bosom buddies in our lives? When a friendship turns toxic it can do some pretty serious damage.

Life has been stressful since our daughter’s diagnosis. Like hair falling out, stomach ulcer, insomnia, panic attacks, kind of stressful. For the most part friends have rallied and have really been there for us despite their own busy lives. I can’t even begin to thank them for that support.

Sadly, there have been disappointments. Maybe what we’ve been going through is just too much for others to deal with? Or perhaps I’m just making excuses for their absence.

Whatever the reason, I’m done making excuses. I’m not going to lose another night’s sleep over it. It’s time to take out the trash and toss those toxic relationships to the curb.

I hate to give up completely however—especially on something as valuable as a friendship. But sometimes it’s better to simply cut your losses and focus on the people in your life who actually deserve your energy and attention.

I also hate that one of these “slacker” friends is in my wedding photos. Fortunately I’ve been able to restrain myself and not go all psycho chick with an exacto knife and cut her big fat head out of my bridal party shots. I’m ridiculously mature I know.

And exhale….

 

8 Comments

  • Oh girl… so sorry… bad girlfriends SUCK! Kick them to the curb! I am sure you are surrounded by many loving friends… and your family. Stay strong. Blah to sucky friends!

  • You're better off. I don't know why anyone wouldn't want to be your friend – its their loss completely!

  • I am or have gone through this to. I think people are solid, but discover true selfishness when I list expect it.

    Honestly? Has happened with some family too,but I'm stuck with them 😉 Still makes me sad to realize I didn't know some people as well as I thought.

  • I've almost been going through the same thing. Not absent friends, but ones who are moody, negative and can't live without drama in their lives. I'm sick of it too and it just brings me down or makes me mad. I haven't quite gotten to the point to ditching them completely, but I've definitely limited my exposure to them.
    We deserve more I say!! And I agree with Kelli…who wouldn't want to be your friend! 🙂

  • I have a friend from high school who, if I met her now instead of then, I would never be friends with. She's just way too high maintenance in the friendship department. Emotionally draining. Fortunately, she lives in a different city and I don't see her often. Sad, but true.

  • This happened to me with a long-time very close friend. It was very hard to deal with, especially since they saw it as no big deal to just move on like our friendship never meant a thing. Its true though, you have to be the bigger person and move on, or it will eat away at you. Focus on your good girlies – they will be there when you need them.

  • That really does suck, but you've got the right attitude. I've told my daughter that sometimes you have friends for different needs or stages you are going through. When that stage passes, sometimes you have to pass on those friends.

    Perhaps you friends is also jealous of your new Party Mummy status! I agree with Kelli, your friends loss.

    (and maybe Shanon will turn around and realize what she's missing) LOL the verification code for this comment is FISHEAD – sorry, I'm easily distracted

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